


The List

by Singerme



Category: Gunsmoke
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-31
Updated: 2013-08-31
Packaged: 2017-12-25 04:15:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,430
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/948519
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Singerme/pseuds/Singerme
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Everyone has a list of things they'd like to do someday.  What would be on your list if you only had a couple of months left to live.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The List

**The List**

I don’t own these characters; I just like to spend time with them.  No other profit to be had.

Just remember, I am not a doctor and have no desire to be one, so some of the medical facts in this little tale may be incorrect.  And of course, please don’t look to me for total historical accuracy.  I’m not even historically accurate about my own history.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

Everybody has a list of things they’d like to do someday.  What would be on your list if you were only given a couple of months to live?

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

Numbly, she walked down the stairs from Doc’s office and made her way slowly down the boardwalk, to her business. Her thoughts were confused and muddled.  Though her spells, as she called them, had been coming more frequently lately and did seem to be a little more severe than before, she’d never suspicioned they were that bad.

‘Blood disease’, Doc had said sadly.  Although he had no way of proving it for a fact without a shadow of a doubt, which was impossible, he’d been fairly sure of his diagnosis.  She was going to die.  And her death would not be long in coming.

Doc had warned her that since there wasn’t much time, anything she wanted done, before she died, she’d better do it soon. _Anything_. Big word with lots of meanings. There were all sorts of _anything’s_ she wanted to do before she died. But where to start.

She supposed she should start with a will. Though she had no family, and few really close friends, she did have a thriving business that she loved and it should go to the one person she trusted the most to take care of it.

But after that was done, what then? Well, she’d have to think on that. When you believe you have a long lifetime before you, you don’t look at life the same as when you know you don’t.

Oh there were things she’d wanted to do. Things she’d always wanted to try, but for one reason or another she’d never gotten to them.  “Someday,” she’d say to herself and go on about her work.  She now knew her ‘Someday’ was almost upon her.

Smiling softly, thoughts of him came to mind. The tall man that had taken her heart so many years before. She had done a lot over the years, sacrificed a lot, to be near him and with him. But he had never claimed her, as she had claimed him.

In truth, there were times she wondered, if he even realized what he’d really meant to her all these years. If he loved her even half as much as she loved him.  He had said once, a long time ago, that he loved her that much.  Did he still?

With a shake her head, she realized it didn’t matter much now.   There were a great number of things that didn’t matter much now.

Wearily she climbed the stairs to her home above her business and let herself into her rooms. Looking around at the tastefully decorated room and the knick knacks and things she’d acquired over the years, she thought of how very useless it all was. None of these _things_ were going to keep her from dying. They weren’t going to soothe her or make her feel better. They were simply that, things.  Useless, pretty things.

For several moments she stood in the center of her room looking about. Finally she decided on a plan of action. Going over to her small oak desk in the corner, she pulled a piece of paper and a stubby pencil from a drawer and sat down and began to write.

For half an hour, bent studiously over her desk, she would write then scratch out then write again. Finally, rubbing her tired shoulders, she read through the list she had compiled and nodded her head in agreement with herself. Yes. This was it. This was the list for the rest of her life, short though both of them were.

The intensity with which she had approached her task had tired her quite a bit. Doc had told her it would be so. But she shook off the exhaustion and rose. Taking her reticule, she took another glance about her home and left. Time was of the essence, especially for her. Though not overly long, her list did have quite a few things on it that she intended to accomplish, before she drew her last breath.

She might as well get started.

**Author’s Note:  Forget to mention, this is set in late season 19.**

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

“Sam, give me a bottle of your finest whiskey.” She said as she approached the bar.

For several seconds Sam stood, blinking rapidly, uncomprehending what she’d just asked for. Finally, “I beg your pardon.” He said. “You want whiskey?”

“Yes,” she nodded. “That’s right, whiskey. Oh and a glass of course.”

Sam looked at her uncertainly. “Are you sure, Ma’am?” He asked. “I mean, I can fix you a glass of branch water or a cup of coffee.”

“I do believe I made myself clear, Sam.” She frowned at him. “Whiskey. A full bottle, if you please.”

“Yes, Ma’am.” He said. “Uh, why don’t you have a seat over there,” he pointed to a table out of the way in the back, “and I’ll bring it over to you.”

“Why, thank you, Sam.” She beamed up at him. “I do believe I will.”

An hour later, Kitty came through the doors and stopped just inside. For several minutes she stood in total confusion and wonder at the woman sitting at the back table, a bottle of whiskey, two thirds gone, in front of her and a silly grin on her face. Finally she made her way over to the bar.

“How long has she been here?” Kitty asked Sam.

“About an hour.” Sam replied. “She just walked in, ordered a bottle of whiskey and a glass and has been sitting there drinking it. I’ve tried a couple of times to get her to stop and perhaps drink some coffee, but she won’t do it.”

“Hmm…” Kitty arched a brow as she turned and looked at Jean Lane, the dress shop owner. “Let me have another glass, Sam.”

Sam handed her a glass and she walked over to the table, sitting down next to the petite blond woman who had never been known to even look at a saloon, much less enter one. “Afternoon, Jean.” Kitty smiled warmly. “Mind if I join you?”

Jean looked over at Kitty and her grin broadened. “Kitty!” She exclaimed, slurring her words. “Ah, my friend. I am so glad to see ya. Here, put yer glass over here and lemme pour ya a drink.”

Kitty sat silently for a minute as Jean poured her a glassful and then some. “Thank you, Jean.” She gently placed her hand over the woman’s and directed the bottle back to the table. “Would you like to tell me what’s going on here? I don’t believe we’ve had the pleasure of a visit from you before.”

Jean giggled in a high pitched tone. “That’s a fact and me with my hand up.” She tried to raise her right hand but it wouldn’t go up. Trying again, she grabbed it with her left and pulled, giggling even more. “I figgered it was about time, Kitty. I mean, you n’ me bein’ fellow bidness owners and you being such a good customer o’ mine and all, I figgered I oughta return the favor.”

“Well, not that I don’t appreciate the business,” Kitty grabbed her hand before she could raise another glass of whiskey to her mouth. “But don’t you think you ought to slow it down some? To my knowledge, you’re not quite used to drinking like this. It could make you awfully sick.”

For just a second Jean looked stricken at the words then laughed loudly, shaking her head. “Sick!” She chuckled. “Yep, that’s the word for it.”

Kitty sensed something was going on and whatever it was, wasn’t good. Pursing her lips for a second, she rose and reached down, taking Jean by the hand. “Come on, Jean. Come with me.”

“Ah, no, Kitty. I got me a bottle I gotta drink. See. I… I…”  Suddenly she turned white as she looked over at Kitty with glazed eyes.  “Oh, I don’t feel so good.” She started to swoon and began sliding out of the chair.

“Sam,” Kitty called with a touch of amusement. “A little help here, please?”

“Yes, Ma’am.” Quickly Sam made his way over to the table and lifted Jean’s slight form from the chair.

“Take her up to the room across from mine, if you would, Sam.” Kitty told him with a sigh and a shake of her head.

A couple of hours later, a very pale and ailing dress maker lay back on the bed with a cool wet cloth on her forehead. She had managed to throw up the contents of her stomach completely and was currently too weak to do much else but lie there.

“How are you feeling?” Kitty asked as she pulled the cloth away, dipped it in water, wrung it out and replaced it.

“Sick.” Jean admitted. “I never knew whiskey could do that to a person.”

Kitty grinned. “Well you know now.”

“It doesn’t do you that way, though, does it?” Jean observed.

“No,” Kitty shook her head. “But then I’ve been doing it a whole lot longer than you have.  Besides I don’t try to kill a whole bottle in one sitting.” Kitty’s grin disappeared, replaced by concern. “You want to tell me about it?”

For several long moments, Jean said nothing, she wouldn’t even look at Kitty. But finally, she raised troubled eyes to her friend and shrugged. “Not too much to tell.” She said softly. “I’m going to die soon and I wanted to do some things, experience some things, I never have, before it was too late.”

“Die?” Kitty gasped. “Oh, no, Jean. Are you sure? Have you been to see Doc?”

Jean nodded glumly. “Yes, he’s the one that told me. It’s some kind of blood disease. He said it won’t be much longer.”

Kitty suppressed a sob and turned away, not wanting to burden her friend with her emotions. “Oh, Jean.” She managed.

Despite a doozy of a headache, Jean pulled herself into a sitting position and took Kitty by the arm. “It’s alright, Kitty.” She soothed. “I’ve accepted it. I’m okay, honest. And now at least, I can scratch whiskey off my list.”

Kitty turned a puzzled look on her friend. “List?”

Jean nodded. “Doc told me that if there was anything I wanted to do, I’d need to do it soon. I know he meant things like, writing out a will and contacting relatives or whatever, and I will do that. But I decided there were other things I’ve always wanted to try, things I wanted to do but didn’t quite have the nerve. Drinking whiskey was one of them.”

Despite the tragic news she had just been given, Kitty grinned. “Well, you did do that. Quite a bit of it as a matter of fact. Want any more?”

Jean returned the grin. “No, I think that will do. At least as far as whiskey is concerned. But I do have several other items on that list.”

“Oh? Like what?” Kitty questioned.

Jean chuckled as she lay back down. “I’ll tell you later. But right now, I think I need to rest. If I wasn’t going to die anyway, this list just might kill me.”

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

At Kitty’s insistence, Jean stayed the night in the Long Branch and woke the next morning nauseous and with a thunderous headache. But she wasn’t too much worse for wear she decided.  At least not for someone who’d never drank before. 

Once Kitty rose, she donned a robe and stepped across the hall, tapping lightly on the door.

“Come in.” Jean called as she was getting up onto slightly unsteady legs.

“How are you feeling this morning?” Kitty asked with a smirk as she entered the room. She had a pretty good idea how the staid and upright shop owner felt after drinking so much whiskey her first time out.

Jean gave her a rueful smile. “Could be worse, I suppose. I can promise you though; I won’t be doing that again.”

Kitty’s smile faltered. There were going to be quite a few things her friend wasn’t going to be doing again and it saddened her to know it. Looking at her friend, she wondered how she would feel if Doc had told her the same thing. What would she do? Would she have a list to complete as well?”

Jean saw the gloomy expression on Kitty’s face and shook her head. “Kitty, please. Don’t look so sad. Things could be a lot worse you know.”

Kitty gave her a curious stare. “Worse? How? Jean, my God you’re… you’re gonna…”

“I’m going to die. Yes, I know that. But I also know that I’ve been given a marvelous gift before I do.” Jean could see Kitty didn’t understand.

Taking her by the arm, Jean led her to the bed and sat her down, perching beside her. “Kitty, life has no guarantees of length. Working here, you should know that, of all people. Every day, you go to work knowing full well, some drunken cowboy with bad aim could shoot you down.”

Kitty shrugged. “It’s my job. But what does that have to do with you being given a gift?”

Jean smiled. “You get up every day and go to work and do what you have to in order to survive another day. You have to worry about the future. I do not. You have time, you think, so you push things to the back burner sometimes, things you want to do but for whatever reason think you can’t right now. I have been relieved of that burden. I don’t have time to push things off into the future because I won’t have a future. So I get to do everything I’ve ever wanted to do, now.”

Kitty sat back and thought about what Jean was telling her. Involuntarily her mind went to Matt. There were only a couple of things she’d ever really wanted to do that she couldn’t currently do and both of them involved a certain stubborn lawman. “I guess, I understand, Jean.” Kitty sighed. “But it’s still not easy.”

“Nothing in life ever is, Kitty.” Jean smiled. “But as long as I have life, I intend to live it. Starting with the second thing on my list.”

Kitty looked over at her. “And what exactly is next on your list?”

“Horseback riding!” Jean proclaimed.

Kitty looked doubtfully over at the tiny, prim woman beside her. “Uh, horseback riding? Ya know, that can be pretty dangerous if you’re not careful.”

Jean gave an amused snort. “Dangerous? What do I care? Look, Kitty, I told you this last night. There are some things I want to do before I die and I don’t have too much time to do them. Now riding is on that list and I’m gonna go riding. How about you going with me?”

Kitty saw the fierce determine in Jean’s face and realized she was going to go, regardless. And it would be safer if someone were with her. “Alright,” she nodded. “Do you have any riding clothes?”

Jean frowned. “Riding clothes? Uh, no I don’t.”

Kitty shook her head with a smile. “I’ll loan them to you. Come on over to my room and we’ll get dressed.”

Three hours later found the two friends riding across the prairie, enjoying the weather and the company. Kitty had stopped by Delmonico’s and picked up a picnic lunch for them and early afternoon they stopped near Spring Creek and settled down for a late lunch before riding back to town.

“This is really nice,” Jean sighed as she sat back contentedly against the trunk of a tree. “I haven’t enjoyed a day this much in… well, forever.”

Kitty smiled. “Well, I’m glad. You know, you surprised me. For a beginner you’re not too bad a rider.”

Jean chuckled. “Oh, I’m not a beginner, Kitty. I used to ride quite a bit when I was younger. But it has been a long time.” For just a second, a shadow of pain crossed her thin face and she sighed deeply. “For a lot of things, I guess.” She added.

Kitty gave her a friend a sympathetic smile. “What’s next on the list, Jean?” She asked to cheer up the moment.

Jean, scratched her sun reddened cheek and pushed a golden lock of windblown hair out of her eyes as she thought about that. “Well, I believe I had going to a dance on there, but unless I hold one myself, I may have to rethink that item. I forgot there aren’t any scheduled anytime soon.”

Kitty sat thoughtfully, for a minute or two, then a smile lit her face. “Well, if you can’t go to a dance, then I say we bring the dance to you.”

Jean looked over at Kitty, unsure what she meant. “We bring the dance to me?”

Kitty nodded. “Um, hm. I happen to know the best fiddle player in Dodge and the owner of the nicest saloon in Dodge. I think I can arrange a dance for you. How’s Saturday after next sound to you?”

Jean laughed out loud and clapped her hands delightedly. “Oh, Kitty, that would be wonderful! But you shouldn’t go to so much trouble. I mean not just so that I can cross an item off my list.”

Kitty shook her head with a laugh of her own. “That’s the best reason I can think of, Jean. Now, it won’t take me long to get everything arranged. I’ll just need to check on supplies and all but I assure you, it will be a wonderful dance. Now do you have a dress?”

Jean arched a brow. “Kitty, I’m a seamstress. I’m sure I can come up with everything I need to attend the dance with except…” Suddenly the smile disappeared and she looked away, green eyes suddenly misting with tears. “You know, Kitty.” She said after several long moments. “Maybe a dance isn’t such a good idea after all. Thank you just the same.”

Kitty looked at her in confusion. “Jean? What’s wrong? Why’d you so suddenly change your mind?”

Jean stifled a self-pitying sob before finally meeting Kitty’s eyes. “I have no one to go with.” Her cheeks colored even more with the admission but she didn’t drop her eyes. “I… that is to say, he…” She shook her head. “I just don’t want to go alone and I’d have to.”

‘He’, Jean had said. All at once it occurred to Kitty who “he” was and why her friend suddenly didn’t want the dance. Reaching over, she took Jean’s hand. “Don’t you worry about a thing.” She reassured her. “You won’t be going alone.”

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

“Oh, come on, Matt. You have to!” Kitty pleaded.  In the nearly twenty years she’d known him, she’d only asked him to do something like this a couple of times before.  She’d been unsuccessful those times.  This time she couldn’t afford to fail. 

Matt had come home early that evening and Kitty had waited until he had found his way to her rooms, late that night, to broach the subject.

“Kitty, I do not have to and I am not going to. I can’t go around telling the men of this town who to take to a dance. Besides, Dave Shipman is not the kind of man anyone could tell what to do.”

“But, Matt, it’s for Jean’s sake. I told you what Doc said about her health. She doesn’t have long to live. She deserves to have a little happiness before she dies.”

Matt came close to agreeing to her plan simply because of the tone of her voice and the soft look she gave him as she laid there in bed with little else on but a see through silk gown. But he shook his head and stubbornly told her, “NO! I will not get mixed up in this, Kitty. I won’t!”

Folding her arms across her chest, Kitty’s blue eyes glared angrily at the big man who’d had other ideas about how this night was going to play out. “Then I think you need to leave, Mr. Lawman. I’m sure you’ll find the jailhouse cot much more comfortable then here with me tonight. As a matter of fact, I can promise you will.”

The next morning, Matt stood for quite a while across from the freight agent’s office, trying to decide the best way to approach the situation. Mentally he was kicking himself for ever backing down and agreeing to this fool plan.  But faced with a night on a lumpy jail cot with Festus’ snores filling the air after a long week on the trail, Matt came to a conclusion fairly swiftly. 

Now here he was, standing outside of the freight office trying to decide how to tell Dave Shipman that he should ask Jean Lane to a dance.  Shipman, the freight agent.  The irony of the name would be amusing if he were dreading his visit to the man so much.  Finally, he took a deep breath, silently cursed a red headed saloon owner under his breath and walked over and into the freight office.

Dave was sitting behind his desk, a book of figures in front of him as well as a full cup of coffee.  His fair hair was mussed, where he’d ran his hands through it and his shirt bore the stains of previous cups of coffee.  He didn’t hear the door open and he didn’t see the Marshal until he stepped up in front of him.  “Marshal?”  He questioned, pushing the book aside and standing up.  “Can I help you?”

Matt hooked his thumbs in his belt and did his best to appear relaxed and at ease, hoping his calm demeanor would pass from him to the sometimes irritable man.  Almost as tall as Matt and heavily muscled, Matt really didn’t want to fight with him if he could get out of it.  “How ya doing, Dave?”  He began.  “Business doing good?”

Dave looked rather suspiciously over at the Marshal.  “It’s alright.”  He answered cautiously, not sure where this was going.  “You come all the way over here just to check on my business?”

Matt forced a nervous smile to lips, which he licked a couple of times and shook his head.  “No, no.  I come over to deliver an invitation to you.”

“An invitation?  To what?”  Dave’s suspicions were still as yet there.

“To a dance.”  Matt answered.  “Miss Kitty, over at the Long Branch is going to have a dance over there next Saturday and she asked me to let you know about it and invite you.”

Dave ran his hand again through his tortured hair and looked at Matt with extreme curiosity.  “Me?  Why?  I don’t know Miss Kitty that well.  What’d she want me there for?”

Matt Dillon was nothing if not an extremely honest man and he’d always believed that honesty was best in almost all circumstances.  But now, standing in front of the tall and wary Dave Shipman, he thought briefly of lying.  But taking a deep breath, he knew he couldn’t, wouldn’t lie.  “Well, Dave, I know you don’t know her that well, but you do know Jean Lane.  I mean, you two coming from the same home town and all, you’re bound to know her.  And since Jean is guest of honor at this dance, Miss Kitty thought it’d be awful nice if you’d come and maybe even escort Jean there.  Her being alone and all, it would be nice.”  Matt licked his lips, praying fervently for this moment to be over.

For several minutes, Dave stood there staring at the Marshal as though seeing an alien of some sort.  “You come over here to ask me to take Jean to a dance?”

Matt grimaced, dropped his head and nodded.  “Yeah.”  Looking back up at the unreadable expression on Dave’s face, Matt waved his hands in a gesture of surrender.  “Look, Dave, you of course don’t have to do this and I’m sure Jean would understand if you didn’t want to, but well… it would something nice to do for her.  I mean, I know you two aren’t all that close, but like I said...”

“I’ll do it.”  Dave answered quietly.

“It would be nice and…”

“I said I’ll do it, Marshal.”

“and well, it’d really make… What?  You… you will?  I mean, you’ll take her?”

“Yes, Marshal.”  Dave sighed.  I’ve got some paperwork to do here and a wagon to get loaded and ready to go out, but as soon as that’s done, I’ll get cleaned up and then go see Jean.  Now, is there anything else?”

Matt swallowed hard and shook his head as he took quick steps back towards the door.  “No, no, Dave.  There’s nothing else.  I’ll let Miss Kitty know that you’ll be there.”

Dave didn’t reply as he watched Matt fairly run from his office.  Scrubbing a weary hand across his face, he sat back down and took a long drink of now lukewarm coffee.  “Damn.” He muttered.  “Well, I guess it’s about time.”

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

Although Matt had hated the onerous task that he had agreed to, he thoroughly enjoyed the private look, Kitty had given him, when he told her Dave had agreed to invite and take Jean to the dance.

“Oh, Matt!” She’d exclaimed. “You are wonderful.”

Matt looked around the busy barroom then leaned down close, his lips just an inch from her ear. “Maybe I can show you just how wonderful tonight.” He arched a brow.

Kitty giggled. “Maybe so, Cowboy. In fact, I’ll count on it.”

Later that day, a cleaned up and somber Dave Shipman stepped into the interior of Jean Lane’s dress shop, pausing a few minutes to locate her at the back of the shop and prepare himself to offer her the short invitation he’d rehearsed. Tugging his hat off, he held it tightly by the brim as he waited for her to acknowledge him.

Jean saw him enter and waited a beat before going to him. She’d known him all her life and still, every time she saw him, her heart raced just a little. Finally she took a deep breath and walked towards him. “Dave? Good to see you.”

Dave gave her a brief mechanical smile and looked down, swallowing hard, before raising his eyes back to her and clearing his throat. “Jean, I’ve come to ask you to the dance at the Long Branch next Saturday. That is if you don’t already have a date.”

Jean shook her head. “No!”  She said a touch too quickly.  “Uh, I mean, no I don’t have a date and I would love to go with you.” She gave him her most ingratiating smile.

Dave nodded, avoiding her gaze. “Well then… uh… what time should I pick you up?”

“Well, the dance starts at six, so how about 5:30? That would give us time to walk over there.” She offered hoping he would say something. 

He did.

Dave nodded again and turned back for the door. “Alright then,” he called back over his shoulder. “I’ll be here.”  His invitation lacked warmth and any hint of affection.  But, she reminded herself, at least he made it.

As he left the shop, Jean watched him through her shop window until he was out sight. Deciding she didn’t want to have to deal with customers right then, she locked the shop door, hung up her closed sign and ascended the stairs to her rooms up above. “Don’t worry, Dave.” She whispered to the man who’d just left. “You won’t have to deal with me much longer.”

Dashing away hurt and angry tears, she ran into her room, slammed the door behind her and threw herself onto her bed. She had loved Dave her whole life and up until he had gone away to the war, she, and everyone else, had thought they would marry.

But something had happened to him in that horrible War Between the States and when he had finally found his way home, he had changed his mind and his whole outlook on things. He would not marry, he’d told her. He would never marry and he was not staying there. He had taken a job with a freight company and would be moving to St. Louis.

The news had shaken her to her core, but she loved him too much to let him go. So, taking her skill with needle and thread as a means to make a living, she had followed him to St. Louis and Abilene and then finally there to Dodge.

He had never objected and never seemed to be surprised when he would see her but he never encouraged her either. Still, her heart wanted what it wanted and nothing mattered as long as she could be near him.

As Dave walked away, he replaced his hat and headed towards his office, but he knew he’d not be able to work. His mind and his heart weren’t in it. Changing his mind, he headed down to the stable, got his horse and rode out of town. He had no real plan of where to go, but he knew that right then he needed to get away to think.

He’d known Jean most of his life. She was the skinny kid that lived on the next farm over from his family. Tough as any boy, she was also as beautiful as any girl he’d ever seen and she had grown into a beautiful woman. As he and she grew into their teenage years and then became young adults, it was assumed by everyone, including the couple themselves, that they would marry and settle down. But it was not to be.

The war intervened in their lives and Dave had done what he considered his duty and joined the army. He had seen many horrible things during that war, had been forced to do many horrible things and those encounters had scarred him deeply. But the worst thing, was the one thing, that had made him decide that he could never marry Jean. After that experience, he was convinced, the girl he loved was better off without him.  Even if he hadn’t been able to convince her.

Crossing the seemingly endless plains, he let his mind wander back ten years to the young man he was and the defining moment in his past that had shaped his future from that day forth.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

Young Corporal David Shipman crouched in the woods near a confederate camp, watching the activity. He had been given the location of the camp by a spy. A young woman who was Confederate by birth but a Yankee by nature. Having not been raised owning slaves, and having been taught against it, she’d found the practice abominable and decided to do what she could to help out the Union side.

Having helped her father, a doctor, many times, she found a way to make herself useful as a nurse to the southern side and worked her way ever deeper into their confidence. Any information she gleaned from her Confederate patients, she would then give to David.

From the moment she’d first met the tall, blue-eyed blond, Amelia Webster wanted him. But he had been completely honest with her, telling her about Jean and their plans to marry when or if he returned home. He had stressed to her that though he was grateful for all that she did, he was already taken. Amelia had reluctantly accepted that. But she couldn’t seem to stay away from him, never the less.

Her young heart had found the man that it wanted and like a moth to the flame, she found her way to him as often as she could. His being assigned to the general there for several months, both helped and hurt her. Though she was able to see him often, she could never have him. But as long as she could help him, she would.

And help she did. From cooking for him, to washing for him and to giving him privileged information she had gleaned from the many men on the southern side that she saw every day.

It was just that sort of information that had young David there that night, crouched in the darkness, waiting for a signal to rush in with his fellow soldiers and take over the enemy camp. When the signal was given, the Union troops rose as one and with a wild cry dashed into the camp, firing until their guns were empty and then fighting hand to hand.

The battle was fierce and for just a moment, it looked as though the Confederates might route their enemies but finally the tide was turned and the Union troops began to hold sway. David had been in the midst of it all and had given very little thought to his actions, working, as it were, on pure instinct.

He had just fired his last bullet and had affixed his bayonet to the end of his rifle when he heard an angry roar from behind him. Turning, his bayoneted rifle held out in front of him, he met the soldier head on as the rebel boy ran straight into his weapon. It wasn’t until the boy began to fall, a look of utter surprise and confusion on his young face that David saw he had killed, not an adult soldier, but a child. A boy that would never grow to be a man.

Dropping his weapon, David turned away and emptied his stomach of its meager contents, unable to bear the pain he now bore at taking the life of a mere child, even if he was in a rebel uniform.

Dave’s sergeant witnessed the event and understood the young man’s distress, having once done the same thing. The older, tougher skinned sergeant took Dave by the arm and led him away. Handing him over to another man, he ordered Dave to be returned to their own camp.

Amelia found him there late that night, having learned of what happened from the same sergeant. She only meant to check on him, only meant to comfort him in some small way.  But she could tell Dave needed more than that and willingly she gave it. Although she could never have him forever, she could have him for one night, and she would cherish that night for the rest of her life. She just didn’t know how short that life was.

Early the next morning, she slipped from his tent and swiftly made her way from the camp and back to her room on the southern side of the fight. She was unaware that her involvement with not only Dave, but the entire Yankee army was known and that she had been followed that night. She never made it back; her body was found deep in the woods two days later.

Dave sat atop his horse, as those painful memories washed over him and once again he remembered the grief and shame he had felt, upon learning of her death. He had truly liked the girl, and had he been of sound mind that night, he would’ve never allowed things to happen as they had. That shame and guilt alone were enough to bear, but when he had learned of her death, it drove him slightly mad.

Not only had he cheated on the one person he loved more than anyone else, but, to him at least, he had been directly responsible for the death of a child and a girl whose only crime had been to love and help him.

When the war was over and he had returned home, he knew immediately he couldn’t go through with marrying Jean. She deserved better. She deserved the man that he once was, not the man the war had made him. He had tried to explain it to her, without going into all the details, but she wouldn’t listen. Like Amelia, she loved him, and she would sacrifice everything to be with him, even  if that had to be as only his friend.

He ran then, taking a job as a freight driver and eventually a manager. He had moved to St. Louis, Abilene and then Dodge, but he hadn’t been able to shake the woman that loved him.  The woman he still loved.

Looking around him at the empty prairie he realized that was how he’d felt for so long. Empty and alone. And he was tired of feeling that way. It had taken many years and a lot of self-analyzing to realize that he hadn’t been totally at fault and that what had happened, was in the past. Jean was his future, if he wanted her to be, and he had finally accepted the fact that he did indeed want her to be.

Taking a deep breath, Dave looked around him once more and emptied his soul and heart of the guilt he had borne for so long and turned back to Dodge, and the future with Jean that he hoped to make.

 **Author’s Note:  Repeat after me** …..  _“Singerme is not a doctor, so she doesn’t know anything about real actual medical facts.  Therefore I should just enjoy the rest of the story and not worry about the details.”_ **Good, now go ahead and read.**

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

Several days passed and Jean managed to accomplish a few more items on her list. None of them major, but all of them important to her in one way or the other.

Owning a dress shop, meant that she sewed fancy dresses on a daily basis for other women. But though she’d made her own clothes for years, she’d never made herself a party dress. With Kitty’s help in the design, she had finally done just that.

She had also, again with Kitty’s help, gone over to Mr. Jonas’ store and purchased her first ever high heeled shoes. She was still having a bit of difficulty getting around in them but she determined that come Saturday night, she would not only walk, but she would dance in them.

While Jean went about crossing items off of her ever dwindling list, Doc had been busy on another sort of list. While at first confident in his diagnosis of the blood disease, he was becoming a lot less sure of the certain outcome, he had predicted.

A couple of days after he had given the bad news to Jean, he had been reading the latest medical journal and ran across a small article dealing with the same issue and mentioning brand new treatments for it that Doc had never heard of. It had even mentioned another ailment that could have the same set of symptoms that Jean had. Only the other ailment wasn’t fatal and could be completely cured.

From that article, Doc compiled a list of very prominent physicians across the country and sent them wires. Several of them replied, asking for more information than he could supply in a telegraph and Doc had painstakingly written each of them letters completely detailing Jean’s symptoms, his diagnosis and treatment, along with slides of the blood samples he had taken. He was now waiting on replies from those physicians and praying he had been wrong.

Of course Doc hadn’t told Jean any of this. As cruel as it was to let her believe she was going to die, when he was beginning to have hope that it wouldn’t be the case, it would be even crueler to let her think there was hope and then snatch it away from her, if he found out his original diagnosis was a true one. So, he kept quiet, but continued to read anything he could get his hands on and wait for the answers that, so far, were very slow in coming.

Jean, of course, knowing nothing of Doc’s efforts on her behalf, went about her life preparing for her death. She had made a visit to Percy Crump’s and made arrangements for a modest funeral, to be the day after her death.

She had also made a trip to the bank and the only attorney in town and set things in motion to see to it that after her death, her shop would be sold and the proceeds would be given to Dave.

While Jean was making her final arrangements, Dave was making his first ones. After he had asked her to the dance he had practically disappeared from view. While he still worked each day in the freight office, he had become very good at leaving precisely at quitting time each day and he would leave town, not to be seen again, until the following morning.

He was certain Jean was wondering why, after asking her to the dance, he had never come back around but he hoped that in time, she would understand and be pleased with what he had been doing. He’d had a lot of time to think, both before and after Matt had come to see him. And though it had taken him a while, he’d finally realized what he’d done to Jean over the years. What he’d done to them both. It was his plan to remedy that and he had a list of his own to accomplish before Saturday night.

As Jean and Dave and Doc went about crossing off items on their lists, Kitty was working on her own list of things to accomplish. She had decided the Long Branch wasn’t big enough for the dance.  So, she had talked Mr. Warner, whose spacious barn rested just outside of town, into hosting the event, with her footing the bill.

She also secured not only Sam as the fiddle player, but several other musicians around town as well. With the aid of the girls that worked for her, as well as several saloon patrons, she had gotten the barn decorated, the tables set up, and an ample supply of food and drinks secured for the upcoming event. The only thing she had left was Jean.

And Jean was going to be harder to get ready than anything else. Shorter than most and thin, with long golden hair, usually kept pulled back into a tight bun, Jean had a very austere look about her. But Kitty could see a beauty and grace beneath the exterior that few bothered to look for.

The night of the dance, Jean had planned to simply wear the dress she had made, the shoes she had bought and consider it good. But Kitty had other ideas.

Marching to Jean’s place, several hours ahead of the dance, Kitty descended on the poor beleaguered woman with curlers, makeup, jewelry and perfume and made her to sit, while she transformed her from an almost homely shop keeper to a stunning young woman, who would turn more than one head, when they saw her.

Standing in her full length mirror and surveying the transformation, Jean was amazed. Never in her life had she felt, and to her own eyes, looked so beautiful. With her hair, down and curled, a much lighter coating of makeup than Kitty wore and just the perfect pearl drop necklace which settled comfortably on her bare upper chest, she almost didn’t recognize herself.

The green satin dress with long lacy sleeves and low neckline to reveal a creamy full bust, had sequins along the neck and sleeves and was pulled tightly in at the waist to accent the curves she had practically kept hidden beneath the drab clothing she usually wore.

Jean gasped at her first glance and turned startled eyes to Kitty. “Kitty, I can’t believe that’s me. It doesn’t look like me.”

Kitty smiled and shook her head. “Oh yes it does, or at least the’ you’ that’s been kept hidden for a long time. Trust me, Jean, you are a beautiful woman and it’s about time you showed that.”

Tears sprang to Jean’s eyes at those words and heavily she sat down in a nearby chair. “It’s too late, Kitty.” She sobbed. “It’s too late.”

Kitty knew what she was talking about and wanted to comfort her friend but wasn’t sure how. The reality was that Jean was going to die whether she was pretty or not. Knowing no other way of comforting her, Kitty pulled her into an embrace and just rocked her.

When Jean’s sobs finally subsided, she glanced over at Kitty. “I’ll be alright,” she told her. “You need to go on and get yourself ready for the dance.

“Oh, I will.” Kitty smiled. “But first I’m gonna fix your makeup. You got it a little smudged.”

Just as Kitty picked up her makeup brush though, a knock sounded at the door. Giving Kitty a curious look, Jean rose and answered it to find Doc standing on her threshold with a strange look on his face. “Doc? What’s wrong?” She asked.

Doc took a scrub of his mustache and gave his patient a very serious look.  “Can I come in, Jean? I have something to tell you.”

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

Promptly at 5:30 pm Dave Shipman, dressed in a brand new suit and with a fresh haircut, shave and bath, knocked somewhat tensely on Jean’s door. Wiping the toes of his already shiny boots on the back of his pants legs, yet again, he stood pensively holding flowers in front of him, trying hard not to whistle, something he did when nervous.

On the other side of the door, Jean stood just as anxiously, trying hard to control her breathing before answering the door. Doc and Kitty had left a couple of hours prior and she had been sitting quietly trying to come to grips with the news that Doc had brought. News that for strange reason was rather more unsettling than what he’d told her just two weeks prior.

The knock at her door sounded again, and she took a deep breath, checked her appearance once more and made her way to the door. When she opened it, both she and Dave stood for silently for several moments studying each other.

“Oh,” Dave finally managed. “You… you look…” He took two deep breaths. “You look more beautiful than I’ve ever seen you.” Dave sighed. “I… I don’t…”

“You look very handsome yourself, Dave.” Jean gave him a grateful and joyful smile.

Dave returned the smile and extended his arm. “You ready?”

Jean ducked her head, suddenly bashful for some reason. But bringing her head back up, she smiled and nodded. “Yes.” She said as she took his arm.

Dave patted her hand for a moment as he held the door for her. His heart was full of words but his mouth couldn’t seem to use any of them as he looked at the beautiful woman he had tried so hard, and futilely, to distance himself from. “I rented a buggy from Moss,” he told her as they descended the stairs. “It’s too far to walk to the barn. Besides,” he smiled happily, “you’re so pretty,  you deserve to arrive in a buggy made of gold.”  He didn’t fail to notice the look of love she gave him in reply.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

“You sure outdone yaself on this here dance, Miss Kitty.” Festus said as he gazed around at the bunting decorated tables and gaily beribboned posts.

Kitty grinned. “Why, thank you, Festus. Say, why don’t you go over and get some punch?”

“Oh, uh… punch?” Festus looked a little disappointed.

“Don’t worry,” Kitty patted his arm. “I have a little something extra under the table.”

Festus’ face brightened as he nodded towards her. “Well, thank ya, Miss Kitty. Don’t mind if I do.”

Kitty shook her head with a smile as he moved off in the direction of the refreshment table. “By golly, Kitty. “ Matt stepped beside her. “This sure looks nice.” His grin turned slightly mischievous as he looked down at her rather exposed assets. “As a matter of fact, you look pretty good too tonight.”

Kitty arched a brow up at him. “You think so?”

“Yes, Ma’am.” He nodded as he stepped closer, glanced around to make sure no one was within ear shot then looked back down at her. “As a matter of fact, I think you look almost good enough to eat.”

Kitty giggled. “Well,” she spoke so that only he would hear. “Maybe you should drop my place later for a bite.”

Matt laughed and nodded. “I think I just might at that.”

As Kitty joined his laugh, Doc walked up. “Jean, here yet?”

“Not yet, Doc.” Kitty glanced around the growing crowd of revelers. “But she should be soon. I think she probably has more reason to celebrate tonight than ever, thanks to you.”

Doc scrubbed his mustache and looked down with a sigh. “If it hadn’t of been thanks to me, she wouldn’t have ever had to think about it.”

Kitty shook her head.  She understood how Doc felt but it was wrong, in her estimation, and she was sure it was wrong in Jean’s as well. “Doc, honestly. You didn’t do anything wrong. As a matter of fact you did a whole lot of things right. Thanks to you, Jean can truly enjoy tonight without worry.”

Matt stood by a little confused as he listened to the two. “What are you two talking about?”

Kitty glanced up at him, suddenly remembering he didn’t know. “Doc’s been working overtime trying to help Jean.” She told him. “He sent out some inquiries to some other doctors and he found out she’s not going to die after all. She does have an ailment that needs treatment and she’ll need to go to St. Louis for that, but it won’t kill her.”

Matt looked at Doc with a slow smile and growing admiration. “You sure, Doc?”

Doc nodded. “Yeah, I got confirmation of it in a wire this morning. I just wish I’d known that before I told her she was going to die. When I think of the needless pain she must’ve gone through...”

Doc’s self-recrimination was cut off as a small hand was placed on his arm. “Doctor Adams.” Jean was beside him, looking lovelier than he could have ever imagined. Next to her stood a man he wouldn’t have recognized had he not known it was Dave Shipman the freight manager. “Could we talk for a couple of minutes?”

Doc nodded and patted the hand that was still on his arm, leading Jean away towards a quiet corner. “Jean, I am so…”

“Doctor.” Jean shook her head. “I’m not sure if I can make you understand this or not but I need to try. When you told me I was going to die, it hurt. It hurt badly. But it also gave me the courage to do some things, I might never have otherwise. It actually kinda freed me in a way. Doc, the way I look at it, you saved me even before today. I want to thank you for that and I want to ask you a favor.”

“What?” Doc was still having a little trouble with his part in the angst the young woman had endured in the last two weeks.

“I never told Dave about any of this.  I do intend to, but not right now. I want to tell him in my own time and in my own way.  Now, Kitty has promised not to say anything yet and I want the same promise from you. Will you keep this quiet until I have the chance to tell him the way I want to?”

Doc nodded his head. “Your secret is safe with me, young lady.” Doc looked over to where Dave stood, watching them with concern and obvious love for Jean. “Now, why don’t I take you back over to that young man you came in with? I have a feeling he just might want to dance with one of the two prettiest women in here.”

Jean smirked at him. “And I’m guessing Kitty is the other.”

Doc grinned but didn’t reply as he took her arm and led her back to her future.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

When Doc returned Jean to Dave’s side, he winked at Kitty. “Kitty, would you like to dance?”

Kitty opened her mouth to reply but before she could utter a word, Matt stepped up and took her arm. “Not this time, Doc.” He grinned at the physician. “The first one’s mine.”

Kitty was thunderstruck as Matt gracefully took her arm and whirled her out onto the dance floor. “I thought you didn’t like to dance.” She eyed him with a smirk.

He grinned. “I don’t. But I’m tired of Doc always whirling you away from me. Thought it was my turn to whirl you away from him.”

Kitty beamed happily up at him. “It always has been your turn, Cowboy. Always will be.”

Matt tugged her closer to him for a moment before releasing her. “Glad to hear that.”

Kitty looked over at Jean and Dave, watching them quietly slip out of the barn before turning her gaze back to Matt. “You know this whole thing with Jean’s got me to thinking, Matt.”

“Oh? And what is it you’ve been thinking about?” He asked noting the suddenly serious expression on her face.

“About life.” She responded simply. “About how fragile it is. Jean said something to me a couple of weeks ago, that’s really kinda stuck with me. She said, "Life has no guarantees of length." And she was right, Matt. Of all people, you and I should know that. We work in two of the riskiest jobs there are.”

Matt nodded solemnly. He had an idea where Kitty was going with this and he wasn’t so sure he didn’t agree with her. “So what do you think we ought to do about that?” He asked quietly.

Kitty shrugged slightly. “I’m not sure exactly. But it should be more than what we’re doing now. I know that for certain.”

The music stopped and so did the couple. “Let’s go outside,” Matt whispered to her.

Kitty nodded and followed him. Once outside, Matt led her to a secluded spot away from the entrance of the barn and pulled her close. Saying nothing, he bent his head and captured her lips in a gentle, tender kiss before pulling away. “Been wanting to do that all night.”

Kitty looked away sadly. “And as long as we continue the way we are you’ll never be able to do it when you want to, Matt.” She said softly. Looking up at him, she grasped his arm. “Don’t you see, Matt? We’ve been putting our lives on hold, you and me. We’ve lived each day just focusing on getting through it but rarely do we enjoy it. I’ve been watching Jean cross items off of her little list these past two weeks and it’s made me think of my own list.”

Matt quirked a brow at her but kept quiet, waiting to hear what her list included.

“My list is different of course,” Kitty continued. “I’ve already done most of the things, Jean wanted to do. But it does have a couple of items on it that are the same.”  She hazarded a glance up to up him to see if he was listening.  He was. 

“Jean wanted to have the man she loved beside her when she died. She wanted to be able to tell the world that she loved him and have him tell the world he loved her. I do too, Matt.”

Her voice broke on those last three words and Matt’s heart about broke at the sound. He knew what she was asking. It was about the same thing she’d asked when Will Stambridge was in town, months previously. She wanted him to pick her over his badge, but he’d refused. At the time, he’d thought he didn’t have the right. No matter that she had given him that right, years before, he still didn’t feel like she was his to claim. At least not yet.

But now, looking down at her, the soft moonlight illuminating her face, her words struck him. Tomorrow was promised to no one. He knew that better than anyone. But as he thought about it, he realized he’d been looking at the knowledge in the wrong way. Instead of pushing Kitty away, to spare her the pain of his all too possible death and to keep her safe, he should’ve been pulling her closer to him. Cherishing what time they did have. Hadn’t Bonner taught him that her safety wasn’t guaranteed, any more than the length of their lives?

Matt sighed deeply and l00ked away for several long moments before returning his gaze to hers. “You’re right, Kitty.” He admitted. “You are right. You deserve to have those things and you should. I’ve just never felt like I could give them to you. I didn’t want you hurt by my enemies and I didn’t want to be my widow with kids to raise on your own.”

“Oh, Matt,” Kitty protested irritably.  “Your enemies have already hurt me and I would grieve for you with or without a marriage certificate.  And I would happily raise your children even if I had to do it alone, because they would be yours. Don’t you understand?  I love you, no matter whether you claim me or not.” 

Matt nodded. “I know you do. And I love you and it’s never been a case of not wanting to claim you, Kitty. It’s just been… it’s…” He faltered trying to find the right words.  Taking a deep breath he looked back down at her.  “Kitty, I wish I could tell you that you could have everything you want in life.  Everything on your list.  But I can’t.  I… I just can’t, at least not right now.”

Kitty studied his face for a long time before replying.  “Are you saying nothing changes?  Or that nothing changes right now?”

Matt pulled her to him, holding her close.  “I’m saying, I’m a stubborn man, whose set in his ways and that changing my way of thinking and my belief’s is going to be hard for me.  But I’m willing to try.”

Kitty wrapped her arms around him, laying her head on his chest with a smile.  “I think I can deal with that.”

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

The day of the wedding was beautiful and sunny.  Not a cloud in the sky.  It was as though God had decided to make the day perfect for two people who had waited so long to be together.

 “Well, you about ready?”  Matt slapped Dave on the shoulder as he came beside him while he stood awkwardly by the altar.  “I talked to Kitty a couple of minutes ago and she said Jean is just putting on the finishing touches.  She also said she was beautiful.”

Dave nodded with a frown.  “She’s always been beautiful.”  He sighed.  “And I guess I’m as ready as I’ll ever be.”

Matt looked at him a little quizzically.  “You mean you don’t want to get married?”

Dave realized how it sounded and shook his head.  “Oh, no, that’s not what I meant.  I think I want this perhaps more than Jean does but I… I…  I don’t guess I’ll understand why Jean has held on this long or how I got to be so lucky as to be the one she held on for.  I know I don’t deserve her.  I’ve done a lot of things that make me less than worthy of her and yet she still loves me.”

Matt’s mind went to Kitty and realized he and Dave had a lot in common.  “Yeah, well, she does love you though.”  He smiled.  “And in a few minutes, she’s going to be yours forever.  You can’t do anything about the past, but you can the future.   Just be sure to make her future worthwhile and the past won’t matter.”

Dave nodded, a smile replacing the frown.  “I guess you’re right, and I do intend to make her future a good one.”  He looked around to make sure no one was near.  “I’d appreciate you keeping this under your hat until I can talk to Jean, Marshal, but I bought the old Marsden ranch south of here for a wedding present for Jean.  I want us to have a place of our own outside of town and a solid place to start our future.”

“That’s great,” Matt said with a smile just as the music started.  “Speaking of the future, here she comes now.”

Dave turned to see Kitty gliding gracefully down the aisle holding tightly to the youngest Ronniger girl as she tossed flower petals on anyone within her reach.  Behind her was the woman he had thought he would never have and would never deserve. Dressed in a full length white satin dress with tiny white beads around the cuffs and bodice, with a halo of flowers in a circle around her head, holding the bridal veil, she was a vision.

When she finally reached his side, he had to reach up and wipe away a tear that had collected in the corner of his eye as he realized that in a few minutes she would be his.  Taking her arm in his, he held tightly as the ceremony began and the minister gave them their vows to repeat. 

When he finally pronounced them man and wife, Dave pulled her into his embrace and softly pressed his lips to hers, deepening the kiss when she enthusiastically responded.  When their lips finally parted and they turned to the people gathered there, to be announced as Mr. and Mrs. Dave Shipman, there wasn’t a dry eye in the place.

Later that afternoon at the reception, Doc and Matt stood near the back of the room watching the other guests and of course the handsome couple swaying happily in each other’s arms. 

“Give you any ideas?”  Doc slyly asked, cutting his eyes at the big man next to him.  “Seems like Dave there is happy he took the plunge.”

“I’m not Dave.”  Matt replied sharply.  “Excuse me. I’m going to get some more punch.”  As Matt headed in the direction of the punch bowl he was followed by Doc’s chuckle. 

“Hello, Cowboy.”  Kitty came up alongside him.  “Buy a girl a drink?”

Matt’s irritation disappeared as he looked down at her.  “Sure.”  He replied.  “You having a good time?”

“Sure am.”  She smiled.  “Jean made such a lovely bride and Dave is so handsome.  They really make a nice couple.”

“Um, hum.” Matt nodded; handing her a glass of punch.  Noticing the wistful expression on her beautiful face as she watched the happy couple, he dropped his head, knowing what she was wanting.

“Excuse me, Marshal.”

Matt looked up to see Jace Sherman standing in front of him.  Tall, well-built, chiseled looks and owner of the one of the most successful ranches in Ford County; he was a catch for just about any woman.  And right then he only had eyes for the woman standing beside Matt.

“Sorry to interrupt you, Marshal, but I just wanted to ask Kitty here for a dance.”  He turned his dimpled smile and brilliant green eyes on the pretty woman, silently begging her to accept.  “What do you say, Kitty?  You’ve danced with everybody but me and the Marshal, here.  I figure it’s my turn.”

Matt winced slightly.  What Sherman said, stung.  Kitty hadn’t danced with him, it was true, but it wasn’t her fault, it had been his.  In fact, he realized, a lot of things was his fault.  “Uh, sorry, Jace.”  Matt spoke up before Kitty could form a reply.  “It’s actually my turn.  Come on, Kitty.”  Taking her hand he led her out onto the dance floor, before she or Sherman either one could say anything.

Kitty arched a brow at him as he escorted her out onto the floor.  “OK, Cowboy.  What’s up?  I know it’s not because you love to dance.  What’s the matter?  Afraid Jace is going sweep me off my feet?”

Matt looked away and took a deep breath.  She didn’t know how close she’d come to the truth in that statement.  “Yes.”  He answered truthfully.  “I guess I am.”

Shocked, Kitty pulled back from him and stopped.  “What?  Matt, you should know better than that.”

Matt studied her face for several moments and Kitty could tell he was trying to make up his mind to something.  Finally he took her hand and turned towards the front where the band was still playing.  Leading her right up front, he motioned to Sam to stop playing then raised his hands as the dancers turned to find out why the music stopped.  “Folks!  Folks, can I have your attention please?”

The question was moot since he already had it from most of the party goers.  “I… uh, know this is a reception for Dave and Jean and all and I don’t wish to do anything to take away from that.  But,..”  He paused and looked down at Kitty’s puzzled face.  “Well, since you’re all here, I thought you should know that in the morning, I’m going to be sending a letter to Washington and resigning my job as US Marshal.”

Cries of, “No.” and “You’re kidding me.” And “That can’t be.  What would we do without him?  Say it isn’t so.”  Were heard all around the building.  Kitty said nothing.  She was too stunned to say anything.

Matt gave her a loving squeeze of the hand, he still held, and raised his voice again.  “Folks, hear me out if you would.  I’ve been Marshal here for over 20 years and I think it’s time I quit and enjoyed life while I still can.  Now, I know you’re worried about your safety, but you shouldn’t.  I have already identified someone to take over for me and I think he’ll do an even better job than me.”

 “That's not so.”  Several voices cried.  “No body can do as good as you.”

Matt smile in gratitude but he shook his head, raising his voice yet again.  “I appreciate that everyone.  It means a lot, it really does.  But you see…”  He paused and looked once again at Kitty’s still puzzled face.  “I got a reason for quitting.  Actually I’ve had this reason for some time but I was just too stubborn to acknowledge it.  And now… well, now I’m hoping I’m not too late.”

Matt pulled Kitty closer to him and reached into jacket pocket, pulling out a small black box.  Opening it, he carefully handed it to Kitty.  “Kitty Russell.” He said with all the solemnity that the occasion called for.  “Will you marry me?”

A hush fell over the crowd and it seemed to him later that everybody had stopped and held their breath as they waited for her answer.  Including himself. 

Kitty stood in stunned silence.  Though they had discussed this topic at Jean’s dance, she had never expected him to actually do it.  For several long moments she stood and stared at the tall man in front of her and then at the ring in the box he held.

“Well?”  He finally prodded.  “Will you?”

Kitty’s smile would have lit up the barn and the countryside had there been no lamps or moonlight.  “YES!” She practically shouted as she took the box and threw her arms around him.

Doc stood at the back of the barn with a satisfied smile on his face as he watched the entire town press forward to congratulate the two beaming people up front.  Reaching into his pocket, he took out a piece of paper and carefully unfolded it.   Pulling a pencil from the same pocket, he made a small mark across some of the words on it’s surface.  “Well, there’s one more off my list.”  He shook his head with a happy sigh.  “I hope those two work fast.  I still have grandkids on this list.”

The End


End file.
